please i need your advice very complicated story

[marie shoobi]

hallo, am here since 2012 on this website,but now my problem is that am still under 24 years but in 5 months i will be 23 and six months,my problem am married to guy liviing in denmark but i have been metting him from time to time in other country last time i saw him was last month but there i realized that ge got a girlfreind so we had problems i tried to defend my marriage also she did her best to keep my husband and this lady knows that i have children with him but she said she doesent care about that and she has been sending me pictures for her being with my man,,and she made him moved to live with her and he got a new number and since that say i didn't get his number or any news what really drives me crazy that how could woman steal others husband and if i was with him all these wouldnt happened at all ,she also saying that am crazy because i am trying to look for him she said that she is clever enough to break my marriage statment and its surprising me because she is a social sundhedsassistent at midellfart kommune,i could find a website i found his new adress in fredericia but the number it shows is not valid anymore,it seems really said,now my question is i need to get my husband's number at least to know what we need to do next ,its not easy that he lives me with the baby ,but i cant find a way ,the only think i know about him is his cpr number and his job and sure his name but dont know where he moved but i know that woman lives in fyn so is there any solution to be able to get his mobile number..i really dont know what to do with my kid and also pregnant just need some opnions.

[mh1]

This will not be what you want to hear, but it is fact:

A person living in DK has a RIGHT to end his/her marriage. (S)he does not need to give any other reason than wanting to end it.

It does not matter whether there are children in the marriage or not, or whether the wife is pregnant.

There are no rules for giving compensation to the spouse who is 'without fault' in a divorce case.

If one spouse has been unfaithful, the other spouse (here it would be you) may file for immediate divorce. If the other spouse does not want to divorce in spite of the unfaithfulness, the other may still divorce but only after a period of separation.

The procedure is that your husband files for separation to 'Statsforvaltningen', and you will be sent a letter asking whether you agree to that. If you don't, or do not answer, he will have to take the case to the court. The court will then decide separation. Six months later your husband can ask for divorce. If you do not agree to that, he will have to wait until twelve months after the separation date and can then take the case to court. The court will decide for divorce.

So your husband's girlfriend does not have to be very clever in order to 'break your marriage'. It is not really all that more complicated than it is to get married. It just takes a little more time.

You can read about the Danish procedure here: http://statsforvaltning.dk/site.aspx?p=6396

[soreng]

And no...There is no official way of getting your husbands phone number if he does not want it to be listed anywhere. It is his right to be unlisted. Your best chance would be to try to "trick" the number out of someone who knows it (like calling the economy department at his work making up a story to why you have lost his number)....But most likely the only thing that happenes is that he will pick up the phone once, hang up when he hears that it is you, and get a new phone number, and you are then back to square one.

[fundiver199]

But another thing is, if children were born in the marriage, and if these children get to stay with you after the divorse, usually your husband will have to make a financial contribution to their upbringing, until they are 18 years old. This is not your sole responsibility, just because you are their mother, and because you do not live in Denmark.

[marie shoobi]

he is saying that he wants to divorce me because that what his girlfreind wants and i didnt get his number but i could reach him by e mail so the case is clear to me i will say no ,,i want to make him suffer before he can divorce because he is not faithfull person and there is also one problem that my son who is not yet two years is not registered in denmark so for that means that he doesent have a child with me,and i think he will lie to the court because he never wants tto pay for his child,,what is possible to do in this case he will go to court but he will not tell him about the child .he has no feelings he never cares about my son ,because he is so happy having one child with one of his ex girlfriend.

[mh1]

When you had your son, I suppose the birth was registered? And your husband registered as the father?

If that is the case, you can send this documentation together with documentation of your own birth and your identification papers to Denmark. Have certified copies made.

They should be translated to English and legalized. You have not told anything about where you are from, so I can't tell you exactly how to legalize, but most likely you have to have it done by your Foreign Ministry or at a Governor's office, and then also by the Danish representation (embassy or consulate) in your country.

You should send them together with a letter of explanation in a recommended letter to:
Ministeriet for
Ligestilling og Kirke
Personregistrering

Rådhusstræde 2A
1466 København K

Draft for letter of explanation:
"I hereby send the birth certificate for my son NN, whose father is AA, to whom I am married. We married in Denmark on the dd.mm.yyyy at XX.
Please register my son in the Danish system
Respectfully yours
Marie Shoobi"

Since you are not living in Denmark, and you will refuse to consent to separation granted by 'Statsforvaltningen', it will probably take so long before the case about separation comes before the court that your second child will have been born.

The steps are:
1) Your husband applies to Statsforvaltningen
2) Statsforvaltningen sends you a letter, which will be sent to the Danish representation in your country.
3) The Danish representation will then contact you to ask you to come and retrieve the letter and answer it.
4) You will come and answer that you refuse.
5) Your answer will be sent back to Denmark.
6) Your husband will within 4 weeks have to actively tell Statsforvaltningen, that he wants to take the case to the court.
7) The court will set a date for the hearing about at least 2 months later, probably even later than that, because there should be time for your husband's lawyer to contact you. This is the time, where you ask for free legal aid and find a lawyer in Denmark (who will be paid by the State).You may claim alimony for both yourself (but will most likely not get it) and for your children (which you will get). You should claim full custody for both children.
8.) The court will decide for separation.

All of this may well take up to a year in all.

If your husband tries to claim that he is not the father, you can bring a paternity suit before the Danish court at the same time as the separation case (that goes for both your son and the child, that is not yet born). Your husband will not be able to deny to give his DNA to be tested.

You cand find information about free legal aid, and the application form, here: http://www.civilstyrelsen.dk/GlobalMenu ... glish.aspx

Please note that your case is NOT a case abroad, it is a case before a Danish court.

You may contact a Family lawyer in this firm: http://www.askt.dk/kerneomraader/famili ... e-bodeling

You can write about your situation via the contact form on the page. This step will be free, and if they take on your case they will also help you applying for free legal aid.